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pictures​.​of​.​monsters

by Pictures Of Monsters

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1.
Forget 04:30
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An overwhelming sadness overcame me My heart dropped as I thought About the life I was eager to leave This is a fever dream I couldn't wake from I was no longer certain of anything All these faces I despised Started looking at me with glazed eyes I could no longer decide If I was making the right choice A voice screaming in my head Inside lead with an anxious lisp Don't forget about me And I was disappointed in myself Cause thats all I wanted to do Forget Forget myself Forget the good things Forget about the late nights spent Upon great heights of cloud nine Why did I want to forget? I wanted love And I felt nothing What was gonna change Was it me? Could I be free from the torment; Abhorrence from skins not much different Than the ones i've been wearing? I want to run Until I can't breathe I want to be someone else I want to be somewhere else
2.
Trendsetter 03:21
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It ignores me so naturally Yet you're there With flowers and and a dagger When both cut just as deep It's always just another love lost And another hole burned in me Each time hurts less But each time there's less to hurt We're all the same We're our own trend setter We're the mistakes we live But we're trying for a little better With our fate in our hands And our love on our skin If we happen to fall How should we brace ourselves? I don't know If I'm ready To fall again For love
3.
Dream 02:42
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I'm too cold to sleep I'm too tired to dream And soon it will all go away Its too much to try and stay And I promise this will be the last you hear from me Chasing a dream, knowing the past won't ever leave
4.
Self-destruct 04:11
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There’s a reason that I'm unloveable Or maybe a series of reasons And within that is the problem. Forever I've thought of them as my problems But the more I look at them The more they seem so innocent and justified. And the ironic part is that The culmination of all of this Is where my only problem lies. How selfish of me To think of them as my problems. There’s nothing wrong with them. I am the problem, And the problem is me. There is a silver lining though: Every problem is bound to have a solution.
5.
I Hate Everything 01:14
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You didn't love me You only thought about yourself And even then you had the option To love yourself But you didn't choose that either You chose to feel nothing at all And I think I'm gonna choose the same
6.
Milo 04:10
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As the sun shines through open windows, today came too soon. You're guilty for being alive When all the wilting flowers have dried Your love is a badge of pride For all the hearts who chose to confide We'd hold hands to see whose is colder. Cry to sleep on each other's shoulder. And if I could now, I'd hold her and say, "It'll all go away if we ever get older" But we won't. You'll put on your black cartwheel hat and hit the town today. Matte lips and blue eyes; Mouths dry and tears drip. So little to see through mascara blinds; You're heavy anchors on a sinking ship. Counting stars like kids count sheep Counting clouds cause kids can't sleep Living now becomes living dreams For an insomniac who couldn't speak Please just let go
7.
Sent North In Night Rain 05:45
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The rain never stops. The rain never stops. The rain never stops. The rain never stops. The rain never stops. The rain never… Stops. My brights are on and all I see is A narrow pathway that slowly Folds out into eternity. The only sounds are the tires Running over the paved road And the incessant knocking Of his bored fingers rhythmically Rolling on the window behind me. I can feel the pulsating breath Of the passenger sitting shotgun, Anxiously asking if anyone else Had anything to worry about. This road doesn't end. This road doesn't end. This road doesn't end. This road doesn't... End. He keeps staring at my dash. He's watching the needle drop, Like a junkie coming down, Just wanting that needle to drop faster. That sound in my ears ringing, Those fingers behind me keep on rolling And all I keep thinking Is that I hate you, And I don't even know if I do You speak frantically You speak frantically You speak frantically And god, what if that needle Never dropped; would you stop panicking? I'd feel more alive than you could imagine. And maybe you'd finally stop screaming. Cradling your pale skin Frail fingers fail to make You feel more secure I don't know how you can sleep When the road looks so god damn beautiful. An artist will eventually hate Everything that they create And I can relate You were my blank canvas You were more contrived Than the life that I'm leaving behind. You were more contrived Than the life that I'm leaving behind. Your breathing stopped, And for a second, I felt alive. Jūn wèn guīqī wèi yǒuqī, Bāshān yè yǔ zhǎng qiū chí Hé dāng gòng jiǎn xī chuāng zhú què huà Bāshān yè yǔ shí. goodbye
8.
Where'd Your Heart Go? 03:53
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Feel. Slide your hands up my arms. Push into my hollow ribcage. Aren't you going to say anything? Wipe off your cheeks. Speak.
9.
To The Moon And Back 04:23
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These voices in my head Are peeling my eyes open Are tying my boots of lead Are tying my rope ends I give myself something to live for And something to die for Give me a reason To make a decision I'll give you back everything If we can start from the beginning If we can restart everything And bring me a first hello I'll give you the happiness That I've never deserved That I couldn't give myself That you've already earned I'll take every word That has ever been heard And force them down my throat In the notes that you have wrote Cut me open And spill my insides I'll give you my heart I'll toss my pride I'll give you the whole world Though the weight is heavy I'll keep it steady For you to be happy You can still be happy Even if things are hard Just look to the sky And know who you are I wish I could give you What you have given me I'll hold you tight Or let you be free You're my one and only Your place my heart will forever lack And we'll all forever love you To the moon and back
10.
Time Moves Slow 05:03
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Love me like you loved the stars When you loved me unconditionally. How nicely they all fit together, Like pieces to a puzzle That you could never quite finish. Now you hate everything about the night. The peaceful silence you used to adore Now drowns you in thoughts of Love and warmth you have no more And those stars in the sky Always seem to be mocking you Misaligned and never fitting quite right It used to be bearable When you had a body to hold Now the cold can barely hold you together And night time lends you ideas Like the heavens lend its stars. And all you can do is stare at them And put them together in constellations And remind yourself That stars are there for me Just as much as they're there for you. On nights where the sky is empty And the silence is so deafening The stars are falling and you think about All the places that you'd rather be And all the sights we'll never see And all the fights that we both lost And the morning grass covered in frost Will almost feel like when we crossed Paths in a coffee shop and sat to talk About our pasts. We're two new people, But at what cost? The stars are dead and took us with Our love is gone, the stars a myth. We can catch up on what we missed, But it won't be the same like when we'd kiss "Time moves slow" as you look at your wrist. And I've written this poem as more of a list Of reasons why I'd love to see your new sky With all new stars and newfound bliss. The stars always looked so beautiful Whether I'm with or without How I'll always be one of those In your sky, without a doubt.
11.
__________ 03:48
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I've had writers block, but nothing like this. This is different. I can write just fine, And I can write about anything that I want, But to me it all sounds the same. I've boiled it down to a formula. Like a machine, I can just spit out Hundreds of these things and title it Let someone else use it and consume it For the time being. All of this will probably mean a lot more To someone else anyhow. I can't be happy With myself, but I'll have someone else see Through my optimism and help me. I can't find myself in a sea of millions of Other people who are trying to do The same thing that I am. I'm not drowning, But I wouldn't call this swimming. Some days I can't even remember my name. I was told this feeling would go away With medication, but nothing's changed. I'm the same kid, Writing the words of yesterday. I got all my problems off my mind, So this must be phantom pain. But if I'm the same kid today, Where'd they take the kid of the future? What about my life and new journey? Why must I speak in a hurry? My lips are curling at the past me And as fast as I speak, I can't seem To avoid spilling all my insides To a crowd that genuinely confides In some of the words I write. I have to apologize. I have to apologize, for any mind That might find sympathy with mine. You'll find that I'm not doing fine, But I know the sun will shine On the waters surface, And it's there that I'll find my purpose. I'll find myself in a sea of millions of Other people who are determined to do The same thing that I am. I'm not drowning, As long as you'll save me.

credits

released July 27, 2018

Mixed/mastered by Otto Schatz
Album art by Jacob Payne

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Pictures Of Monsters Kalamazoo, Michigan

Leaving this world isn’t as scary as it sounds

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